Tuesday, March 22, 2011

I Think This Guy Has Been to Our Mall a Few Times....

Have you ever walked into a public restroom and seen poop smeared all over the wall? I mean really, what kind of person does sick shit like that? I once walked away from a job when my boss told me to go clean the bathroom (that wasn't part of my normal duties anyway) (yeah, I said "duties" in a post about poo). Anyway, I walked in, opened one of the stall doors, and as far as I could tell, someone's ass just exploded. After gagging hysterically, I simply put my cleaning supplies away neatly, walked out to my car, and drove home. Never to return. No sir, not enough money in the world. 

Later on, I got a job working a part of the ground crew for Delta Airlines, and part of my job was to empty the lav toilet on the planes every night. I paid one of my co-workers $10 to do it for me every time. Never did it once. One day the "poop tube" came loose and spilled all over the guy draining it. He looked like a skinny, wet Smurf with bits of turd and toilet paper stuck to him. 
At that moment I knew it was money well spent.

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